Shop More Submit  Join Login
×

:iconintricately-ordinary: More from intricately-ordinary


Featured in Collections

All The Poets Come To Life by flummo

writing by Hfeather53

Poems Litterature Typography by TheForsakenGoddess


More from deviantART



Details

Submitted on
February 19, 2013
File Size
1.6 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
550
Favourites
38 (who?)
Comments
27
×
sometimes I begin to believe I am not real
and the obligations of the world
are too many to swallow,

when they drop me, I will go (but
please don’t count upon the feathers
bleeding through my back, halos
hang like a noose, I

am a single dawn: do not
count on me to raise again
   it wears me out, gossamer
 thin and glistening as they wait
   for something to explode)

in a month, I will not remember
my name. I will have shed my skin
someplace south of the border and cold,
ice cold where the air is stale
and barely alive; in a month

I will be unable to look back.

but now, these floorboards creak
under the assumption of forgotten
memories; I left something of myself
in a night dark and long and lukewarm

like the people it stirred. wake up,
they wondered, it is dusk and
the trees are breathing and it seems
we’ve lost our way

(he said, let’s float once more
through the field of broken
things, before we die and before
I forget why I came.

it was almost sentimental the way
he fell soft when he realized I could
never come home again)

I am a figment bastard child
of the hopes for a better time;
imaginary and ebbing with the
scent of dying dreams, please,

wake up
trying new styles (probably failing)

I am surreal.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconakercoke:
Akercoke Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2014
I love the imagery and turn of phrase but I can't quite find the meaning :( I'll read this again later but I'd like to hear some of the author's intent behind it.
Reply
:iconnothingspecial62:
NothingSpecial62 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013   General Artist
you are not failing. c: don't give up, okay? everything the first time is probably going to sound a bit... awkward, but that doesn't mean it's bad. it's like anyone always says: "practice makes perfect."

in my personal opinion, this poem is simple, but has a deeper meaning behind it. i really like that. <3 i am also a sucker for surreal things, so please keep up on your new works. i know i have a joy reading them.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
you are such a sweetheart, your comments always manage to keep me going. thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:iconnothingspecial62:
NothingSpecial62 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013   General Artist
(≧∩ ▽ ∩≦ ) th- thank you so much. it makes me real happy to hear that (though personally i don't think i deserve it), and you will always be welcome.
Reply
:iconmozartsnemesis:
MozartsNemesis Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013
"halos
hang like a noose, I

am a single dawn: do not
count on me to raise again
it wears me out,"

Love it!

" it is dusk and
the trees are breathing and it seems
we’ve lost our way

(he said, let’s float once more
through the field of broken
things, before we die and before
I forget why I came."

mm.. so deep and thought provoking. Im not as huge a fan of this one as I am of some of the others.. but this one is still awesome. <3
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you very much!
Reply
:iconmoonlightequilibrium:
Moonlightequilibrium Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Reminded me of [link]
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
That's such a lovely song. And very similar (eerily so)
Reply
:iconcontradictory55:
Contradictory55 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Writer
It feels like you are, in a world where people can wander and pluck words from trees and plant them in a beautiful cycle to live on.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:heart:
Reply
Add a Comment: