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I'm ready for a romance to ravage my heart and tear apart my
dusty limbs, I'm waiting for someone to take my breath and
never give it back; I'm prepared to sell all I was for a trip
somewhere new - beyond the paper mistakes I sailed away
down the river long ago. (even rocks and leaden thoughts
won't let the truth sink.)

I left my being somewhere under a waning summer sun
when the trees hummed melodies of moving on;
my soul still stays there, porous and pining and
lost. Dying stars don't lead home.

I suppose
it's more than just losing
your words, it's losing
you

too.

I am someone who mourns Sunday morning for another lost
week. I am weak, I am of mice and the men who cower
beneath compromisable truths. I have already
made more mistakes than loose fingers in
two days and a little breathing room.
I am not special. I am the worst
kind of normal, and further
more, I am sorry.
I am me.
Hello 2013.

(ramblings and a little too much truth)

:iconglory-be-project:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconforestmeetwildfire:
forestmeetwildfire Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
That last stanza :heart: so painfully yet refreshingly honest.

(but you are special!!)
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you :heart:

and :blush: thank you again!
Reply
:iconforestmeetwildfire:
forestmeetwildfire Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
My pleasure :heart:
Reply
:iconsammur-amat:
Sammur-amat Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013   General Artist
SO. MUCH. LOVE. for this piece, for your talent and most of all, for you! :love:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're such a sweetheart! My goodness, thank you! :love:
Reply
:iconsammur-amat:
Sammur-amat Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2013   General Artist
I'm nowhere near as kind-hearted as you, though. Seriously, the pleasure is all mine. :tighthug:
Reply
:iconhaphazardmelody:
haphazardmelody Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is amazing! I am going to agree with the majority of comments I read and say that the last stanza could definitely stand on its own as a poem. This is really, really good.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'm so honored to hear that! Thank you very much!
Reply
:iconblacksand459:
Blacksand459 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
How very beautiful, Maddie.

And I must echo the sentiments of the other commenters: I am glad you are you. Just the way you are. B-)
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:love: thank you so much! That means the world :tighthug:
Reply
:iconthemoormaiden:
TheMoorMaiden Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is beautiful and very real. It's like you're writing about me or something. ^^;

I love the lines:

I'm ready for a romance to ravage my heart and tear apart my
dusty limbs, I'm waiting for someone to take my breath and
never give it back
:heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:love: ohhh I'm so very touched you related to it. Thank you so much! :heart:
Reply
:iconthemoormaiden:
TheMoorMaiden Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome. :)
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
love that second stanza and the final stanza whittles down quite rhythmically.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much! :tighthug:
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
welcome :)

not quoting the title, hehe ;)
Reply
:iconhaanyaan:
Haanyaan Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Student Writer
I read the first stanza and had to add it to my favorites. It just kept getting better too.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're so kind! :love: Thank you so much!
Reply
:iconhaanyaan:
Haanyaan Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2013  Student Writer
You're so very welcome :huggle:
Reply
:icondogmatickerr:
DogmaticKerr Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Your ramblings really are some of the loveliest little things about you, miss! I'm doing my best to temper my own self-importance, but I feel like some of the ideas in here are... well not directed at me, but stated to oppose things I know I've said! And this is where the temperance comes into play - I cannot be the only person to tell you how wonderful you are! I digress!

This poem is quite exquisite in the mood and atmosphere it presents, the intimacy of the thoughts and the open honesty of the words used - this train-of-thought feels like a calmly stated stroll through your heart amidst motes of dust dancing in the last rays of a setting sun. I particularly enjoy the structure - the length of the first and last stanzas, so weighted against the middle two and it resembles how deeper-thinking feels. You have this bubbling up-swelling of thought and emotion, it plays out over a period of time until you reach another swell, a realization or simply hit the end-of-the-line. I think the very last stanza, though, goes to show just how incredible you really are.

I am sorry for my redundancy! :worship:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
What a kind comment! I'm lacking words to respond, thank you so much for such thoughtful and wonderful feedback! :heart:
Reply
:icondogmatickerr:
DogmaticKerr Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You are, of course, welcome... and I've already taken steps to write a rather poetic 'comment' for you entitled "Adoration" as you know! :bow: :worship:
Reply
:icondreamsinstatic:
dreamsinstatic Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
Your fantastic work has been featured in Friday Night Features.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You are precious! :tighthug: Thank you!
Reply
:iconcontradictory55:
Contradictory55 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Student Writer
:tighthug: You should never be sorry for being you :tighthug: because no matter who you are, you are human. You are flawed. Just like everyone else in the world, neither better nor worse than them, but different in a way inescapable.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you hon :huggle:
Reply
:iconcontradictory55:
Contradictory55 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Student Writer
My pleasure :tighthug:
Reply
:iconvespera:
vespera Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I love these "ramblings" - and as other's have said - that last stanza is a little gem. :heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:iconfuzzyhoser:
FuzzyHoser Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This whole thing is so very lovely. I do believe you have at least 2 poems here, though. That last stanza could easily stand on its own. It really caught my attention. :heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Haha, it was actually two poems. I was worried about leaving the last stanza on its own so I added in a little more. Thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:iconfuzzyhoser:
FuzzyHoser Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Ah...well you should trust yourself. It needed nothing. The beginner bits are quite nice, though. I can see being torn on splitting them. ;)
You're very welcome.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I always worry about posting short pieces and having them not mean enough D: But I will keep that in mind! Thank you again, so much, for your support :huggle:
Reply
:iconfuzzyhoser:
FuzzyHoser Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Nah.. It really impresses me, actually, when I see a piece that's small and packs a punch. That takes skill. :) You're still welcome. lol
Reply
:iconmozartsnemesis:
MozartsNemesis Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
YES! (sorry, that I actually exclaimed that out loud.) This is wonderful. such a contrast of hope and despair.. really beautiful.

favorite lines:
"(even rocks and leaden thoughts
won't let the truth sink.)"

and

"I am of mice and the men who cower
beneath compromisable truth"

both these lines are truth in magic words. A fave. :)
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're so sweet! :heart: I'm very honored to hear you enjoyed it, thank you so much :huggle:
Reply
:iconschneekrahe:
schneekrahe Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
it's like you're just writing about my life lately. i kind of absolutely love how relatable it is. you have a really wonderful way with words <3
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
well that's just the loveliest compliment, I'm so touched it's something that you relate to. Thank you so much :tighthug:
Reply
:iconschneekrahe:
schneekrahe Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
you're very very welcome <3
Reply
:iconglossolalias:
glossolalias Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
that last stanza is perfect :heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much! :heart:
Reply
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