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we live in a world of apologies.
I made a mistake a year back,
choosing my addiction to oxygen
over less demanding things.

I’m sick of trembling for problems
that aren’t mine and I’m sick of trying
to romanticize black holes and
the indiscriminate nature of lithium and
I’m sick of waking up every morning
feeling sick. and truly, I’m sorry

but I’m not ready to accept my role
in the making of myself. I’m not ready
to lament for those with a smaller
pain tolerance, and for my dislike
of anything that requires commitment.
I’m sorry I miss you and I’m sorry
I won’t admit that out loud.
how scary is it to be something
so unalterably heavy, to be diagnosed

as your own worst enemy, but god,
you’re so fucking beautiful,
and not in the stereotypical boy
meets girl meets fairytale way, but

the kind that makes my heart
bleed a million miles quicker.
I just wanted to cry on all
your scars and wash them clean.
when things are bad for so long,
everything’s an answer. I’ve developed
an unkind predisposition to all items
toxic, but goddamn, every song
by Nirvana understands me so well.

I would’ve loved you more if
you had hated me. but now, here
I am, recreating you in verses
on my wrists. all things

are in a constant state of recreation;
in a year, I will be reborn, but
I’ll still tremble when I’m made to wake up,
I’ll still reference you in poems
I shouldn’t write.
and I'm sorry for this
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:iconsilent--songbird:
Silent--Songbird Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Amazing, just... truly amazing
Reply
:iconhaphazardmelody:
haphazardmelody Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
"recreating you in verses
on my wrists"

I hope you're okay. :heart:
Reply
:iconhavefaithinbooks:
HaveFaithInBooks Featured By Owner Aug 19, 2014
You're so amazing.. The words you use to describe the emotions make you almost literally feel them. 
You honey, are an artist!
Reply
:iconglossolalias:
glossolalias Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2013
I'm sorry that I have nothing profound to say about this but hot damn. You've gone from good to unrivaled.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
i love you
Reply
:iconimperfect-parachute:
imperfect-parachute Featured By Owner Nov 10, 2013  Student Writer

"but I’m not ready to accept my role
in the making of myself."

 

"I just wanted to cry on all
your scars and wash them clean.

when things are bad for so long,
everything’s an answer."

 

"I would’ve loved you more if
you had hated me. but now, here
I am, recreating you in verses
on my wrists."

 

The three parts that made me stop and read the poem again. From the start. Many times. The way you capture emotion in this is incredible. This is such an amazing poem. I can't get over how brilliant this is. Great, great work to be able to capture the emotions so effectively. You are so talented. I love this!

 

Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
oh my goodness :love: thank you so much. this is one of the most literal, honest poems I've ever written; the positive responses mean the world to me
Reply
:iconimperfect-parachute:
imperfect-parachute Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Student Writer
You're most welcome. I couldn't be anything other than positive about that piece. It still takes my breath away. :heart:
Reply
:iconsycamoresea:
SycamoreSea Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You know,
you just keep writing these poems, and they make me want to say something, to comprehend how your honesty and your beauty are tearing me down, and I never can think of just the right thing to say, so they sit here in my inbox, and I don't know what to do, but please don't stop writing.
I love the way "my heart / bleed a million miles quicker" is just slightly slanted so it's unexpected, and still makes sense. I love - so many lines here, I won't list them all for you.
But did I mention please don't stop?
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
asdkjhksafs :love: for you, I'll never stop!
Reply
:iconcamelopardalisinblue:
camelopardalisinblue Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:huggle:
Reply
:iconiyraemm:
IyraEMM Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
you are so amazing. 
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
ahh that means the world from you :love:
Reply
:iconerinm31:
ErinM31 Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013
featured your beautiful poem in my journal: fav.me/d6sbzip :heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
what a beautiful feature, thank you so much :love:
Reply
:iconerinm31:
ErinM31 Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2013
My pleasure! :hug:
Reply
:iconerinm31:
ErinM31 Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013
wonderful work, excellent capture of the feeling :huggle:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you!
Reply
:icondjcloud16:
djcloud16 Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013
I love all of this. The way you're able to morph seemingly typical lines into something beautiful and original is amazing. "the kind that makes my heart bleed a million miles quicker", so powerful. And, "I’m sick of trembling for problems that aren’t mine", so fucking real and true.

This is just raw perfection, thank you for taking the time to write this.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
that means the world to me, thank you so much :love:
Reply
:icondjcloud16:
djcloud16 Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013
keep on keeping on man :)
Reply
:iconsadiakhattak:
SadiaKhattak Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
beautiful poem...
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you <3
Reply
:iconsadiakhattak:
SadiaKhattak Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:)
Reply
:iconliliwrites:
LiliWrites Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
when things are bad for so long, 
everything’s an answer.

Truth. :+fav:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you :heart:
Reply
:iconstars-hide-fires:
stars-hide-fires Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I LOVED THE END.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you!
Reply
:iconzoefletcher:
zoefletcher Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I just... I just.... [sobs]
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:tighthug:
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I really loved how this ended

all things

are in a constant state of recreation;
in a year, I will be reborn, but
I’ll still tremble when I’m made to wake up,
I’ll still reference you in poems 
I shouldn’t write

your writing of late feels very stream-of-consciousness. you do it very well.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you. i keep getting antsy because i can feel my writing change every couple of weeks but i'm glad to hear it works. 
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I know the feeling.
it does work though.
Reply
:iconperfling:
Perfling Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Student General Artist
I’ve developed
an unkind predisposition to all items
toxic

:heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:heart:
Reply
:iconpartner-in-crime:
Partner-in-crime Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Jesus your works are just...fantastic. 
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:love: thank you
Reply
:iconpartner-in-crime:
Partner-in-crime Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
:]
Reply
:iconhyalma:
Hyalma Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Maybe I was in the right mood for reading this, maybe it's just a great poem. I'm going to go with the second option though, because it is great. It was overwhelming really, all the emotions took me by surprise and I ended up being heartbroken, but in a good way, if such a thing exists. Sorry if this isn't making much sense. Your poem is lovely. Good job!
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
that makes a lot of sense and I'm really honored I was able to write something so impactful to you :love: thank you so much
Reply
:iconhyalma:
Hyalma Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome, dear.
Reply
:iconqueenapollyon:
QueenApollyon Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Student Writer
This is absolutely beautiful; I'm speechless. (;
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much! :heart:
Reply
:iconqueenapollyon:
QueenApollyon Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Student Writer
That's ok! ;)
Reply
:iconantipluesch:
antipluesch Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013
don'tbe sorry for the poem, it's quiet well, i feel understand once more... i like you. :)
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
you're too sweet <3
Reply
:iconrema-alkhany:
Rema-Alkhany Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2013
nice
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
<3
Reply
:iconget-fancy:
Get-fancy Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2013  Student General Artist
dear god this was beautiful 
Reply
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October 25, 2013
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