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i swore
i would never number the poems
i wrote about myself because that
would be like ticking off the days
until my breakdown;

i was a moth, unapologetically throwing myself
at any gleam of hope; wasting my wings
on industrial promises


colors always felt much more
appropriate for the purple boiling
beneath my heart and the pallid
purposelessness of my head,

but i was born into a colorless world--

no one sees me behind the metallic scars
of my skin and iron grating of my voice against
the grain; no one sees me as more than
gray regret or monochrome mistakes,
no one sees me but

all i ever wanted was for a
fallen god with feathered heels
to believe in me: to pray upon
the monuments i built for
broken dreams and to baptize me
in his tainted tears,

i just want him to be real. more
than anything, i want to be real, i want
to be more than an imaginary friend
to various mental limitations; i want
to trade my liquid skin [evaporating]
for a chance to be

i am a moth and you are the lighthouse

i want you to see me
i want to look in the mirror without seeing a ghost.

a few random things:
-when talking about symbols that represented us the other day, i thought i was a moth
-"you don't see me" [link]
-~melodysnow wrote a poem that made me think sometimes gods are really human

A reading because *0hgravity said I ought to.
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:iconfallenfromthemoon:
fallenfromthemoon Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Ahh this is beautiful!
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:heart:
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:iconpartner-in-crime:
Partner-in-crime Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
This.

Just this.

Wow.
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:love:
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:iconthypoetsorcerer:
ThyPoetSorcerer Featured By Owner Jul 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Moths and a song from Mer de Noms...I think you are my favorite person.
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Jul 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
ahh :love: thank you
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:iconauthorofthings:
authorofthings Featured By Owner May 24, 2013
this is nice
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner May 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:heart:
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:iconlizziestardust:
lizziestardust Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
wow. every line is perfect. & lovely, lovely imagery :)
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so so much :heart:
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2013
wasting my wings
on industrial promises


:heart:

And then the -reading-. Jesus. I love your voice to bits. :heart:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
ahah! What I wouldn't give to have a voice as lovely as yours! :heart: Thank you, dear!
Reply
:icondisrhythmic:
disrhythmic Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2013
Hush, yours is -gorgeous-. :heart:
Reply
:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Absolutely gorgeous.
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you :heart:
Reply
:iconriseandbe:
RiseandBe Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
My pleasure!
Reply
:iconssensory:
ssensory Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013   Writer
This is ingenious! Really amazing. :la:
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:love: Thank you so much!
Reply
:iconssensory:
ssensory Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2013   Writer
You're very welcome! :la:
Reply
:iconsammur-amat:
Sammur-amat Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013   General Artist
Gosh, you have a freaking gorgeous poetic heart in you! :love:
I won't dare pick a favorite line in a poem so ravishing! :tighthug:
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
ohmygoshhh you are too lovely to be real my dear, and I have a feeling I say that a lot, because every time I speak to you I am reminded yet again :huggle:
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:iconsammur-amat:
Sammur-amat Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013   General Artist
Well gosh, I'm kind of in a bind here, because I want to say all that and some more about you. I can't ever thank you enough for your friendship, you lovely, lovely girl! :heart:
Reply
:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Professional
Ths has a very Plath-like lilt to it. The images really work—I love the moth/lighthouse dichotomy, a lighthouse is such a safe option for a moth yet such an unlikely one.
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow, that's such an honor. :blush: I'm glad to hear you liked the moth/lighthouse reference, it's what I wrote this poem around. Thank you so much. :heart:
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:iconintrasect:
IntraSect Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013
You find only warmth from authentic flame.

False light blinds as though it has a name.
Eye's fluorescent wake is ash-blue strain.
Burning not to last; now scorched in shame.
Oceans of emotion heal like rain?

The lighthouse is you. Count-down to change.


[link]


(A voice so small -- why, with soul untamed?)
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much :huggle: your words (and included example) are lovely.
Reply
:iconvespera:
vespera Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:heart: lovely and universal.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you :heart:
Reply
:iconcontradictory55:
Contradictory55 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Student Writer
Your poem always touches this place inside me :tighthug: And it's a wonderful, soothing touch, even if it is a bit sad and lonely too.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:iconcontradictory55:
Contradictory55 Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2013  Student Writer
You're welcome =)
Reply
:iconspiritlesssoul:
SpiritlessSoul Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013
This is my favorite poem in deviant art, thank you
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much! that's an honor :love:
Reply
:iconspiritlesssoul:
SpiritlessSoul Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013
IF you get a spare moment you are welcome to crtique my work :)
Reply
:iconmozartsnemesis:
MozartsNemesis Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013
"colors always felt much more
appropriate for the purple boiling
beneath my heart and the pallid
purposelessness of my head,

but i was born into a colorless world--"

This is so hauntingly beautiful. Another top of the line poem. You continue to amaze me with your talent, and your sniper's aim with the words you so easily command.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'm honored :love: thank you so much for your kind words!
Reply
:iconhaphazardmelody:
haphazardmelody Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Love love love this.
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
you ought to do a reading of this one. (or sing it? just noticed it's filed under songs and lyrics)

I like the voicing of it. feels very honest and thoughtful.
and this bit:

no one sees me as more than
gray regret or monochrome mistakes,
no one sees


--especially monochrome mistakes
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
oops! that was a mistake. Thank you so much :heart:

and I did it, for you :stare: [link] it's pretty lame ><
Reply
:iconsteffenc-itsjustme:
SteffenC-itsjustme Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You have a lovely voice ^^ just thought I'd let you know.

And I think you did a great job of reading it aloud :)
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:blush: that's so sweet of you! I'm always anxious doing readings.

thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:iconsteffenc-itsjustme:
SteffenC-itsjustme Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I always feel like I'm interrupting, when I respond to a comment that wasn't directed at me XD like in a conversation between two people through comments on a deviation.

Happy to tell you, I just thought you should know ^^ and I can understand why you'd be anxious about that, don't think I'd have the courage to do it with my work. Two reasons: One, lack of courage, like I just said XD, two, because I never read my poems aloud to myself. Which is strange, because some of them are written in the form of Spoken Word..AND I love rap music, which is all about reading aloud poetry to a rhythm or a beat. Hmm..perhaps I should start reading some of my poetry aloud to myself. See, all this came from you doing a reading and me commenting on it! What a wonderful virtual world we live in ^^

It was my pleasure :glomp:
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:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I hope you have an opportunity to read them! :)
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:iconsteffenc-itsjustme:
SteffenC-itsjustme Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you, I hope so too ^^
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
oh, haha, I was actually considering asking to make a song of it. welcome!

:iconstarelaplz: aw, I like it. thank you!
it kind of fits well with the song after it, haha
Reply
:iconmelodysnow:
melodysnow Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013
This is really raw and beautiful and I love it. :huggle:

And, I love that song so much.
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
that means the world to me, thank you :tighthug:

I've been listening to APC all weekend, and 3 Libras on repeat :heart:
Reply
:iconmelodysnow:
melodysnow Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013
Awh :huggle: You are really talented, you know? You have a beautiful way with words.

Yes! Because they are awesome. :la:
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