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:iconintricately-ordinary:
To start off, I love the underlying basis of this piece. You have this wonderful way of exploring new literature which I think is unique to you. The comparison, I feel, was very clear and strong.

I do think you could have used more prominent imagery, however. In an attempt to keep it soft and melodic, I think, it felt very weak.
As a specific suggestion, I would've loved to see you humanize the deer some more. Because that is the beginning of the piece, it would be something to pull the reader in and let it resonate more.

Wording, like imagery, I believe could dive a little deeper. Right now it feels as though the piece is reliant on what we, the audience, already know of deers and their nature. Emphasize your points, and more specifically, the greater effect it has. I understand you wouldn't want to leave it over-explaining, but write enough so the reader knows where you stand. (Right now I have assumptions, like that a weak person fled from a relationship they weren't ready for, but more definition would be marvelous.)

All in all, I think the biggest way to improve this piece would be just to dive a little deeper. In the symbolism, wording, philosophies- everything. Obviously, the backbone is already very amazing. Great job.
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